A day of me going back to my secondary school, to get my SPM result. It's totally disaster if compared my result with the others; they're totally insane and driving me mad! My result is really a big difference with theirs! But still, it's not the main reason causing me feel sad; it just covered up 10-30% of my sorrows.

another 10% comes from seeing my friends with their beloved girlfriends @_@...They're so lovely, and I feel so envy...I wish I could be the same as them, just even a single chance will be nice...I wish she would be with me, haiz...just a dream after all...

other leftover are...I think I should say because of her, indirectly. She does come to get the result today, but the moment I saw her is exactly less than 30 seconds, quite a short time eh? She came, and her face is still as beautiful as an angel, or I should shorten it too...She's still perfect in my sight. She took her result, and I asked her how many A's she got. I've estimated she must be either full A's or almost full; but something unpredictable happened. Her result isn't...I shouldn't say about that, I've hurt her enough for asking such a dumb question. I'm not senstive and maybe hurt her feelings. She looks sad, which directly cause sorrows occur on my heart. I couldn't bear to look at your sad face at all.
Later at midvalley after watching 'Underworld 2', my mates had went to a small shop to have a tea. During that time, my pet sis asked me what her result. Actually, every of my friends know that I like her. I didn't answer her, and told her that it would be better if she ask her herself. She then make a phone call to her, and asked her about that. When the conversation between the two almost end, I asked my pet sis to lend her phone to me. She did, and I took the phone from her. When I first hear her angelic voice, it cause my bloods begin to boil, while heart beats increase. I'm a fool; I tried to joke to her asking her that whether she knows who am I. She answered without any hesitate, and says bye bye to me. Oh my gosh...These words does hurt me a lot...You know, although I'm almost immunize to wound, but I'm not hundred percent; espeically to her, she could easily cause any pain to me. Left with no choice, I told her bye bye and ended the phone call.

Throughout the day, I'm keep on thinking over her; from the starting of the day waiting for her arrival until now, when I'm typing these article.
There's a sentence which quite meaningful from a song. 'Those who focus themselves too deep in loving someone will easily get hurt'. Yeah, I'm totally agree with it. I'm sure that I love her so deep that...I can easily get hurt. I don't wish you would be sad; I just want to see you smile, and at leaast...talk to me like a normal friend. I want to communicate with you just like the others, without having hard time when talking. Don't know since when we had become like this, but I want to get back to the time when we could talk, jokes, laugh happily.

It's so painful to speak out these three words, but I know I can't keep those words from you...

~*I...love...you...*~